Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Randomize
