Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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