Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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