But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
