ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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