so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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