We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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