HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
