Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
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