im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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