Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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