we have pet lesbian snakes
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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