Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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