He uses pillows to masturbate.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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