there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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