Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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