Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
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