my mouth tastes like poor choices
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
