I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
