: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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