youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
In other news, I just burned my penis
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
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