dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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