I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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