So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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