i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I want her autograph on my taint
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
