Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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