i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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