Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
You're completely useless in the revolution.
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
oh god the rape fog is back!
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
