doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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