I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize