God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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