Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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