Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
