I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
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