I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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