sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
