sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Randomize
