i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
