so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
