You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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