What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
