It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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