i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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