My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
