We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Randomize