dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize