youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize
