she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
