2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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