haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
